If you're not already doing so, I'd encourage you to think of gigs in terms of various goals. This helps to give you the right attitude for a gig, and it may help to keep you from feeling grumpy or even resentful. Let's talk about goals. There are many possible reasons for doing a gig, such as:
for pleasure/fulfillment
for money
for contacts/networking purposes
for exposure
for "credibility" (to be able to say that you played at such-and-such event, or at such-and-such venue, or with so-and-so musician).
It might be helpful, then, to do two things:
Ask yourself why you want gigs in general. In other words, what are your gigging goals? You may have one goal at this time, or several.
Look at an individual gig and ask, "what's the goal for this particular gig?"
This little exercise could keep you from feeling down about a gig, and/or from being grumpy towards those around you. For example, instead of complaining that a particular gig isn't "artsy" enough, you may remind yourself that you're there to meet and play with a certain important musician. If that goal is met that day, then mission accomplished!
It's not my place to tell you what your goals should be. But I have seen some people seem to lose sight of the relationship between goals and gigs, and negativity ensues. In fact, thinking about all this may even explain why you should- shudder!- turn down a gig! After all, if it doesn't meet a goal (it may even contradict a goal, such as doing a high-exposure pop gig when you're trying to become known as a jazz player), then should you really be doing it?
I like to say that today's gig might feed my family, while tomorrow's gig might feed my soul. This is possible because I'm personally at a place where both of those goals are important to me and compatible with each other.
Whatever your reason, embrace the goal, so that you can embrace the gig.
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